• Nastavi

New old hobby

My SO bought a gaming laptop a few months ago, after buying a PS5 first. In the beginning we didn't really use them but lately we've started playing more and more games together. Gaming was my biggest hobby for most of my life. Real life responsibilities sometimes require a bigger amount of attention though, and for the past few years, gaming became an escape for me again. I wrote an article not too long ago about what gaming meant to me. Never was I able to share this hobby with the people around me though. Being able to share my love for games and introduce her to new realities made me feel free and more connected to both her, and games.

We explored the horizons of a new world. Literally, the game is called New World. A shared friend of ours also plays this game for several hours a day, every day. We try to join when we have the time and energy. But lately something strange has been happening to how I want to exercise my hobby. As I mentioned, I used gaming as an escape from the real world. Avoiding responsibilities, secluding and isolating myself. It was a way of coping. Especially during my past toxic relationship. But now, my hobby feels different to me.

I've reached a point in life where gaming no longer serves the purpose of being an escape. To be honest, whenever I play games without my SO, I feel a little empty. It's when we can discover a world together, when I feel completely at home. Playing games is no longer my favorite hobby. Now it is playing a game together with her. The fact that she's interested and willing to share the experience with me made me realize that I feel loved, understood and whole. I never had to push her to join me, as it was her own initiative.

There is this other friend of mine who is in a relationship where they do not share the same interests. I've been there, it is no fun. In one of my future blogs I am going to elaborate the relationship between him, his wife, my SO and me. As it is rather complicated and needs quite a lot of explaining. For now you'll have to do with a brief summary.

My friend was deeply in love with the woman I'm with, even though he is married and a son. He recently admitted that he still is. He doesn't know I know, and he doesn't know I told my SO. I asked him why he and his girlfriend aren't playing games together. She doesn't like his hobby. He made a gaming room and he occupies it more and more every day. Whenever opportunity arises, he can be found in there. He said that not everybody has this ideal situation as I do. Which I can only assume relates to more than just playing games together.. Over the past year and a half I noticed that he is growing more tired by the day. And his situation looks very, very familiar. Can't wait to elaborate everything but this is all I say about this for now.

A shared hobby can make a great foundation for a relationship. It makes things easier, but it's not the hobby itself that's the most important. It's the willingness and motivation to try whatever the person you love the most likes to spend their time on. Trying only once and concluding the hobby is not something for you is not the way to do it though. Understanding what, and why the other person likes certain aspects of their hobby as much as they do, is what's important. She showed me that. She gave me that, without having to ask. And I would've done the same if she had a different hobby. I am forever grateful for that. We will continue with our online journey.

- Nastavi